![]() Postal authorities removed a cigarette from a photo ofblues artist RobertJohnson to help dignify the musician in a new stampthey’ve issued in hishonor. Althoughcompletely deaf, she is an expert lip reader.Personally, Idon’t think she’s that pretty, y’know? I, uh– … Not… Not my cup of tea. The first deaf Miss America, Heather Whitestone, wascrowned last week in Atlantic City. Althoughunearthed only days ago, he is already engaged toAnna Nicole Smith. Scientists in Africa have discovered the oldest knownhuman ancestor, born 4.4 million years ago. … And when it happens to you, it’slike, “Well, all right, there’s something out there.”And, doggone it, that’s my point - there issomething out there. I was at theBob’s Big Boy in Paramus, New Jersey … and Iactually saw liquid rust coming out of the butt of theBig Boy icon. And I’m happy to tell you,I’ve had a religious experience myself. And a week later, a girl in Italysaw the Virgin Mary crying. He saw the hand of the statue ofthe Jesus bleeding. You know, two months ago, a man in Spain had areligious experience. …And that was a lesson that I needed to learn. He had an oily rag stuffed inhis mouth and a bullet through the back of his head.And I said to myself, “My God! How could he do that tohimself?” … His business was booming! And then Irealized - the attendant had a fear of success. His arms and legs were tied atthe back of the toilet. ![]() Finally, I found the attendantin the bathroom stall. There were about eightcars waiting for service so I went into the gasstation to see what the heck was going on and therewas shattered glass everywhere and an empty cashregister on the floor. I was driving through Pennsylvania andI stopped at a gas station. Now, you can’t anticipate a life lesson - it justhappens to you. No one needsyou.” Now, what surprised me most about being firedwas that everyone said the same thing to console me:”You know, everything happens for a reason.” And astrite as that sounds, I think it’s better to hear itout loud because when you hear it in your own head, itsounds like “You know, anything can happen with arazor.” … I was fired from a job recentlyand I think whenever something ends in your life,whether it be a relationship or a job, there’s alwaysa message. You know, Ithink it’s important to stop and pay attention to whatlife can teach you. …Īnd now, with a commentary, here is Weekend Updatecorrespondent Laura Kightlinger. Readers wereshocked by her revelation that, while living at theWhite House, she had sexwith former President George Bush. And filmmaker Ken Burns announced that,following his “Baseball” series, his next documentaryproject will be a twelve hour, eight part “History ofthe Dorky Haircut.” …įormer First Lady Barbara Bush published her memoirsthis month. Arab andIsraeli negotiators, workingthrough the night, accidentally resolved the baseballstrike. … You’re big fans of the Haitian strongman,are ya? …Īnother breakthrough in the Middle East. Haitian general Raul Cedras, who will be stepping downin two weeks, held a hasty garage sale of someknick-knacks he’d acquired while in office.
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